


I Won't Let You

by smolbeanswithredhairandguyliner



Series: The Life of My Chemical Romance [1]
Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: 2005, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Depression, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Love, Tour Bus, Touring
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-15
Updated: 2016-02-15
Packaged: 2018-05-20 21:04:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6024829
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smolbeanswithredhairandguyliner/pseuds/smolbeanswithredhairandguyliner
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>My Chemical Romance, a 12 year log journey that changed hundreds of thousands of lives, for the better or worse. 2013 is when they came to a sad end, but there's always somewhere to start, and that's here, in a beaten up tour bus with a depressed lead singer and a scared band.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Won't Let You

Touring definitely wasn’t what the 19-year-old had in mind when he agreed to join the band. He did have touring in his mind, but it was the same touring as all kids imagine it - hotels, private planes, relaxing, sleeping. He was so very wrong.

The Chemical members whooped and cheered when the old, rickety bus pulled up. Frank didn’t see what all the fuss was about, but he joined in. He had been waiting to begin this tour ever since they first found out about in 2004. Some guys showed them around their bus, and it wasn’t exactly as Frank had expected. There were 12 bunks, a small walkway in the middle. There were 3 sets to their right, and the same to their left. Each bunk had it’s own green curtain to cover whatever was inside. Bob and Mikey didn’t waste any time in throwing down their bags on the lower bunks. Ray and Gerard followed, but the smallest chose an upper bunk in the furtherest rear corner. He didn’t know _why_ he chose it, it just sort of happened. He didn’t realize he was across from the black haired lead singer when he chose. No, totally didn’t.

They were led into another room that the man called a ‘kitchenette’. Bob snickered and couldn’t resist teasing the younger guitarist about how he was a ‘Frankette’. Despite it being embarrassing to have his unnatural growth pointed out, they all laughed. He probably would’ve frowned and pushed past him in previous years, but now Frank was used to being teased. I mean, he was the runt of the band, not that he really minded anymore. He got 4x the girls Bob did. They moved on and were showed the bathroom, which was… a let down. They were told they couldn’t do things they normally would in a sink - no brushing their teeth, no shaving - only washing your hands. They was a united groan from the members, but the guide just laughed and moved on. The last room was just a room. There wasn’t really anything special about it - a rectangular of extra space in the back of the bus. There was a bench and table, and a chair. The members looked confused, and the guide laughed again, but this laugh seemed darker, a laugh that wasn’t meant for something funny.

“You’ll find out what this room is used for eventually,” He sighed. Clearly he wasn’t very fond of the room. He clapped his hands loudly, signaling that was it. He showed the guys how to plug in a game console and helped them get their stuff on board before leaving to begin the drive. Gerard jumped to it just as the man left.

“Okay, so whenever we are having a tour coming up, we’ll put the details here. Whether or not there’s a shower, hotel, if there’s a private bathroom. You know? Also, as for-“

“Gee, I love you, but shut the fuck up,” Mikey mumbled, walking back into the bunk room. The older brother frowned, but they all followed him. Mikey sighed as he found his bag that he previously put on the bed.

“I’m excited for this tour, but how am I supposed to sleep there every night?”

“It won’t be every night, Mikey. If you had listened to me you would’ve known there would be hotel nights where-“

“We stay in a hotel?” He finished his brothers sentence for him. Gee glared at his sibling. “I’m just saying, there’s no way I’ll be able to comfortably sleep on this bed.”

“Maybe being short isn’t so bad after all,” Frank smiled. He jumped up easily into his bunk, having plenty of extra room by his feet and all around him. Mikey glared and mumbled some insults in return, laying down on the bed that was much too small for him. Gerard laughed at his brother’s grumpy attitude. Frank thought his heart may have melted when he heard the older’s laugh - it was adorable.

“I’m going to bed,” Bob announced. Ray agreed, and they climbed into their own bunks, Bob knocking his head as he did so. Once they had all closed their curtains, the standing of the leftover two smiled. _Beers?_ Gee mouthed, gesturing to the kitchenette. Frank smiled and hopped off his bunk to follow the singer into the other room. When he got in, Gerard had already made quick movement to grab two cans and position himself on one of the couches. Frank joined him, popping open his alcohol. They drank, the older one considerably more than the other. On his fifth, Frank began to worry about his friend.

“Gee, slow down,” Frank joked without much humor.

“What? Oh don’t w-worry ‘bout me, Frankie Boy,” Gerard slurred, “I’m j-just f-fine.” Just as he finished the sentence, he fell onto the younger’s lap. He was crying. Frank stiffened for a second, but eventually relaxed. He brushed through the drunk’s greasy, black hair.

“Shh, don’t cry,” Frank tried to comfort him, but that had never been his strong suit. He awkwardly pet Gerard as he cried into his lap. The sad one quieted down after a while, and the other thought he had fallen asleep. He was proved wrong when the elder spoke.

“I want to die, Frank,” He whispered. The guitarist felt like he had just been dropped from a 30 story building and he was in the middle of falling.

“No, hey. Hey, hey, hey,” Frank straightened Gerard so that they were looking at each other, “Everyone loves you. They _adore_ you, Gee.” Gee stayed still, not looking like he cared at all. He looked defeated. “Please, Gee. They need you.” Nothing. “The band needs you.” No response. “Mikey needs you.” He looked away, but the small one grabbed his chin and forced his eyes back to him. They were red and irritated against his pale skin, streaks of dried tears on his face. “Lindsey needs you. Do you know how much that woman loves you? A lot Gee. A whole fucking lot.” This time he cracked and started sobbing. Frank pulled him in his arms, rubbing circles onto his back. He knew it hurt him to hear about Lindsey. He had been so torn up about leaving her, but he needed to remember how much they loved each other. “Gee, _I_ need you.” He cried harder.

“B-but Frank I hate m-myself. I’m just an alcoholic. My pants have fallen down during a concert. What kind of person does that happen to? A fucking spaz, Frank. I don’t deserve what I’m getting. I don’t want to keep on living.”

“Yes, you do deserve everything you’re getting, and more. You need to love life. I will help you love living. You’re amazing and so incredibly talented, okay? I agree that your alcohol is becoming an issue, but we can fix it, Gee, we can fix it all,” i held him close to me and he sobbed, mumbling inaudible things into the black shirt Frank was wearing. The young one just held the man to him, never wanting to let go. If Gee died… Oh, God, Frank was scared by just the thought. The band would end before it even began. Lindsey would be devastated, and Mikey, who knew. Mikey would malfunction, he loved his brother. Frank would hate himself, more than anything. He would blame himself. That night, if Frank wasn’t there, it would’ve been a horrid ending to an incredible life. An ending to the life of someone who saw art and creativity and inspiration in everything.

“I want to go to bed,” Gee mumbled after what felt like forever of crying into Frank’s chest. Frank cupped his cheeks and pulled him up, kissing his forehead. The younger put their foreheads together, staring into Gee’s bright hazel eyes through his shaggy hair.

“You’re incredible, Gee. I want to hear you say it.”

“Frank-“ Gee protested, but Frank wasn’t having it.

“I want to hear you say you’re incredible.” The depressed sighed, knowing Frank wouldn’t let him go anywhere until he did what he was told.

“I’m incredible.” Frank smiled. He rubbed his thumbs on the others cheeks, wiping away the tears that hadn’t gotten onto his shirt.

“Again.”

“But-“

“Say it again, Gee.”

“I’m incredible.”

“Yes, you are. Now believe it.” Frank kissed him on the forehead again and led him back to the bunks. Gee crawled into his low bunk, muscles aching. He fell asleep quickly, not bothering to change into pajamas. Frank jumped into his own bunk, but he couldn’t fall asleep. He watched Gerard, who had forgotten to shut his curtain. He was scared. Gerard was not going to kill himself, not while Frank was still around.


End file.
